Twins

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Twins

FBF · Resident crash test dummy

That's a front loader.

A twin tub is upright.

...or did you mean the two bikes that are singles?

Snaf · Loadsabikes

I think he's referring to the second letter of the Greek alphabet β often used to reference something that is second best. Alternately the picture means nothing and it's just another sexual fantasy.

Are they 200's or 350's Simon?

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

FBF wrote:
That's a front loader.
A twin tub is upright.
...or did you mean the two bikes that are singles?

Ha ha ha F nice one.

They are a matching pair of Beta Alphas 200cc's of pure grunt Both Sorned at the moment but not for long although it did take over an hour to get the tanks off.

****ing clever little Ities you can change brake pads in the blink of an eye.

I really am very excited to have them :) :) :)

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

Fine looking machines both Simon. What are your plans to feck them up - some basic maintenance perhaps?

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Yes Peter my advanced maintenance schedule is already under way because they are not quite as groovy as the photo suggests.

Not ridden for 2 years only 1 of them starts and tother has no spark but turns over nicely all 4 hydraulic brakes are non functioning plus only 1 tail light in the lighting category.

Both are road legal and came from Exmouth off a dude called Will looks like they were used in a motorcycle training school in sunny P for a while but for 1700 nicker the pair I'm over the moon Jim, I will get 1 mot for 1 of them and clone the other ****er.

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Sophisticated cloning process already underway.

Identical livery.

FBF · Resident crash test dummy

Very sophisticated clowning. I guess getting both bikes to a non running status should be quite easy for you, were you planning on using them as book ends?

Sounds like a bargain SC

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Hey F what you reckon on the no spark situation I was going to swap the electric components from the runner until I found the culprit what you reckon coil CDI unit and maybe the stator plus old Peter reckons it's a bad earth but then he's only just mastered fixing a chain with a split link so maybe take that with a pinch of salt.

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

I thought I would copy the wiring from the non sparkers rear light cos it is working and do same on other but I have a migraine.

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

Try slapping it with a dead fish Simon.

Closer inspection of the photographs reveals the bikes appear to have been maintained in accordance with your "standards" so I suspect we won't be seeing you on lanes anytime soon.

-- Edited by Jhonny Yoga on Thursday 1st of September 2022 07:17:09 PM

FBF · Resident crash test dummy

super****le wrote:
Hey F what you reckon on the no spark situation I was going to swap the electric components from the runner until I found the culprit what you reckon coil CDI unit and maybe the stator plus old Peter reckons it's a bad earth but then he's only just mastered fixing a chain with a split link so maybe take that with a pinch of salt.

Before you go swapping bits over I would check the wiring out for bad connections and the kill switch circuit including the switch which I would disconnect for the time being and make sure a hidden immobiliser switch hasn't been put in. It also may have a side stand switch but unlikely/
Favourites would be multiplug connectors to the stator and CDI and HT coil etc.

A quick google says Beta had a problem with Stators and CDI units and the 200 still had that problem for sometime throughout its production so my guess stator probably favourite. I would check the stator and connections for signs of burning and the rectifier/regulator. It could be that a faulty stat and reg could blow the CDI so would advise against swapping out the CDI until you are satisfied the stat/reg circuits are okay

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

F you ****ing legend it was the multiple plug connector for the CDI unit ****er was full of mud .

she's alive but both bikes have bad clutch drag so going to change the oil as they have both been sat idle for 2 and half years.

I'm so excited I'm about to lose control and I like it.

Mot booked for Tuesday but I don't know which one to take as I love them both equally ❤️❤️❤️

Dirty Ming · Wannit delivered? Well do ya punk?

Not the only thing to have sat idle for 2 and a half years... 🙄

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Dirty Ming wrote:
Not the only thing to have sat idle for 2 and a half years... 🙄

Fully agree mate old PBC is one lazy dude.

Kayaking

Fishing

Drinking.

Jammy git

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

Oi you douche bag, dog faced, lamp post sniffing dirt bag ... for clarity I've just had three months off to assess the future without working to earn a salary .... I'm getting bored already. How do you cope?

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

Good to know slapping it with a dead fish helped clean up the bad earth

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Bad earth my ass.

Anyone know where I can get a seat cover for my Alpha's?

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

At a Beta retailer?

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Yeah ****in 70 nicker!!

I just ordered one shiny red and black one from Ali express for 7 quid delivered it looks kind of kinky 👅🍆👅

FBF · Resident crash test dummy

super****le wrote:
Yeah ****in 70 nicker!!

I just ordered one shiny red and black one from Ali express for 7 quid delivered it looks kind of kinky 👅🍆👅

Probably made from Chinaman's foreskin

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

Simon have you gotta an MoT on one of them twins? I suspect you are staring at a them, like a gimp, with a slack, befuddled and dropping jaw and wondering what to do now? I hope I'm wrong n you gotta an MoT

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

you wont have done though

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Well slappa my thigh it seems Leo Wanker rides again.

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

Lordy lorks the world quakes .. red flag wavers fail to apply for the job....

Tim · stephenson spielburg

One is beside one's self with excitement for the coming outing.

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Tim wrote:
One is beside one's self with excitement for the coming outing.

Yes me too I've made a mini 11 day advent calendar with little hand drawn pictures of Beta Alphas behind each little cardboard door.

I just noticed one of the bikes has regular foot pegs and other one you'd need feet like Ronald Mcdonald to reach gear and brake pedal.I will take a photo.

Dirty Ming · Wannit delivered? Well do ya punk?

Could it be the gear lever has been moved up cuz the previous owner used it for trials?
You may be sitting on a Dougie Lampkin original worth thousands.

Or a piece of ****

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Apparently Dougie always signs his bikes on the inner surface of the side panel, I'll have a look.

SamHB · Trail riding god

Strap that old rubber **** to your boots and hey presto you have clown feet.

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

SamHB wrote:
Strap that old rubber **** to your boots and hey presto you have clown feet.

Chuckle berry Finn.

But I need 2 are you free next Saturday?

SamHB · Trail riding god

I’m hoping to be free - however I have once again tested positive for COVID following my flight home from the USA….

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Well **** me!!! Japanese engine Spanish wheels and brakes and now ****ing Austrian foot pegs what the **** do the lazy bastard's at the Beta factory actually do all day.

Peter I think I've found your next job.

Snaf · Loadsabikes

Just be thankful for any parts not made in Italy, although the foot pegs were most likely made in India. Did you never see my Beta and hear me moaning about it, mind you that had a KTM engine.

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

super****le wrote:
Well **** me!!! Japanese engine Spanish wheels and brakes and now ****ing Austrian foot pegs what the **** do the lazy bastard's at the Beta factory actually do all day.

Peter I think I've found your next job.

Good spot cheers mate. It does sound a perfect opportunity.

Can you please write me a letter of introduction that will land me the role?

And post it biggrin

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

The first thing, in my new role as better advisor for Beta, that I'll suggest to the Board of Directors is the need for diversification into making parts but not necessarily bike parts. Big knickers for fat women is Beta's future ... we'll need a Business Originator...

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

Someone focused on sniffing out niches and unexplored opportunities in the "bigger beta girl - fat knicker celebration" .

It will be hard to find the right person to fill that position I reckon

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Jhonny Yoga wrote:
Someone focused on sniffing out niches and unexplored opportunities in the "bigger beta girl - fat knicker celebration" .

It will be hard to find the right person to fill that position I reckon

Dear sir I would like to be considered for this position,

Chubsters and their undergarments has always been an area of special interest to me, if I get the job I will get straight on it and launch with a range of heavy duty knickers for the ultra large ladies which I will call

the fart and give us a clue range.

All best wishes Simon.x

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

Good lord - I cannot imagine how I overlooked you Simon. Someone with such a preternatural interest in the position of Business Originator for Bigger Beta Girls underwear collection....of course Simon you will be a totally perfect fit for the fart and give us a clue range of underwear from Beta which, one imagines, will need to be significantly more robust than the cobbled together motorcycles themselves.

Before I can confirm terms and conditions of position I will need to convince the Italians that I'm "Il Duce - Consultante Correctomundo" to turn their business around (only between 10:30 and 13:00 Tues to Thurs from November to April).

Tutto va bene, que cuesta magnifico, a plan!

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

I@ve realised - there is the flaw - I needed a letter of recommendation to approach the bored Board of Beta you needed to write it and post it. Fail.

So over to your creative mind you pseudo-taffy fek wit - how to deal with winter?

Dirty Ming · Wannit delivered? Well do ya punk?

Hibernate?

I'll wager it's not the first time he's curled up in a ball and slept in a hedge

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Jhonny Yoga wrote:
I@ve realised - there is the flaw - I needed a letter of recommendation to approach the bored Board of Beta you needed to write it and post it. Fail.

So over to your creative mind you pseudo-taffy fek wit - how to deal with winter?

So no job ?

Oh well **** it then I didn't like the hours anyway.

Bring on the winter cos I've just bagged this bastard for 100 nicker so that's 2 wood burners plus heaps of all ready chopped up windows and doors from my new mate George who has fully forgiven me for the carp episode and handed me the key to his old land fill site near Leigh Delaware M4 service station which has an old overgrown track on it.

I have spent the night in a horse box with a proper plumper, we both got bitten All over our naked bodies by sheep ticks she reckoned.

SamHB · Trail riding god

So do we all get a invite to this old wasteland and overgrown track?

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Yes certainly but no one is allowed to overtake me.

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

Ridiculous idea overtake you ha ha ha.... So Georgie two scoops wants you buried nearby Leigh Delamare in his landfill n then get your mates to ride bikes over the shallow grave n thereby bury you further?

He's a bit of an operator is your mate George!

Aims to kill you at his landfill then place his fish bereft wife's bones with your ones n blame his mates...

Jhonny Yoga · Trail riding god

Not now Kato.

Clouseau n out

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Old two scoops is sweet as with me but his missus is a different kettle of fish, she told me to **** off earlier today so I made a Sharp exit.

I fear my chances of fleshings with Pat died with the fish.

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Seems I've got one stock standard Alpha and one set up for trials with extra chain tensioner, foot pegs 4 inches further back shortened rear brake lever and bar risers I'm heading to two scoops landfill tomorrow with the stock one for a shake down as it has the sweetest sounding engine.

the trialsy one has a distinct top end noise which I think is called piston slap my question is if I buy a 0.25 mm larger piston kit does it need to be bored out or will it just be a snug fit???

Snaf · Loadsabikes

I expect the barrel will be worn if there's play in the piston, just ride it until it loses a lot of power then fix it. I think there's a big bore kit for them.

supercockle · Anasol anti botty grapes

Roger that 👍

Thanks Snaff.